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How to handle custody case when child doesn’t want to see you

On Behalf of | Dec 30, 2025 | Child Custody

You’re bound to experience a wide array of emotions during your divorce. And the matter can become even more tense and heartbreaking when your child winds up in the middle of it all. This can be especially true if your child has voiced not wanting to spend time with you. When that happens, you might be tempted to shrink away from your child, but doing so isn’t healthy, and it may not be in your child’s best interests. After all, there may be several factors contributing to their behavior and an unjustified belief that they shouldn’t spend time with you.

So, before throwing in the towel in your custody case, you have to dig into the evidence and find ways to repair your relationship and advocate for time with your child. Figuring out how to effectively do that can be tough, but hopefully the information in this post will give you a strong starting point.

What to do if your child says they don’t want to spend time with you

First and foremost, you shouldn’t give up and give in. Instead, you should consider taking the following steps to ensure that your child’s interests and your relationship with them is as fully protected as possible:

  • Collaborate with the other parent: If you have a good relationship with the child’s other parent, then you may be able to speak with them about what’s going on. They may be able to provide some insight into what your child is experiencing that contributes to their feelings. This can give you a better idea of where to start repairing your relationship with your child.
  • Seek therapy: A mental health professional may be able to help you zero in on the issues facing your child and provide your kid with the coping skills they need to get through tough times, including divorce proceedings. If you’re able to engage in family therapy, then this mental health professional may be able to directly help you repair your relationship with your child and assist them in getting over whatever barriers they’re facing in wanting to spend time with you.
  • Talk to others: If you have a contentious relationship with the other parent, then you can’t completely rule out parental alienation. This is where one parent manipulates the child to try to distance them from their other parent. By talking to those who are familiar with your relationship with your child, you may generate evidence showing that alienation is occurring, which could give you a leg up in your custody proceeding.
  • Ask for a child custody evaluation: This is a process where a neutral third-party, usually a mental health professional, analyzes the family’s dynamics by interviewing witnesses, reviewing records and observing parenting time to determine what sort of child custody arrangement is best for the child. The evaluator may then be better positioned to determine if alienation is occurring and whether a restrictive custody order that limits or blocks access to your child is really in the child’s best interests.

Don’t give up in your child custody dispute

It’s no secret that the outcome of your child custody case can reshape the relationship you have with your child, which can have long-term implications. With so much at stake, you can’t just throw up your hands and walk away from the situation when arguments get tough. Instead, you need to develop your own compelling legal arguments so that you effectively fight for the outcome that you want and that’s best for your child. To learn more about the best way to approach your child custody dispute, speak to a legal professional.

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